Pick of the Brown Bag
April 2, 2022
by
Ray Tate
Welcome to first of another two part Pick of the Brown Bag. For those who just arrived, my name is Ray Tate. In this blog I review television series, movies and sometimes prose novels. Mainly, though, the name of the game is comic books. If this blog is too in depth for you and you need a decision ASAP, check me out on Twitter: #PickoftheBrownBag.
I'm often questioned about why I don't pick up certain books. In that regard, I'm probably much like you. I'm not invested in that particular character. I'm not wild about the art. I dislike the writing, but the comic book as I have said before isn't like any other medium. Comic book series present other challenges.
Sometimes there are just too many. This is how I feel about Spider-Man.
I like my Spider-Man Amazing, Spectacular and Marvel Team-Up. Once you stick in overlapping specials, mini-series and/or maxi-series, you've pretty much lost me.
That said. I gravitate toward certain scribes, and the presence of these writers guarantee my at least flipping through the Spider-Man titles, even if they are weirdly numbered and/or part of one, two or, blimey, three mini-series.
Because of Jed MacKay and Kelly Thompson I wagered this current lot of Spider-Man titles would make sense even if I hadn't followed the whole enchilada. Sure enough. I was right.
Amazing Spider-Man starts the snowball rolling. It's designated 78.Bey. Short for 78 Beyond, which should in no way be associated with Batman Beyond.
Although it's subtitled Beyond and borrows Terry McGuiness' friend Max.
Eleonora Carlini, Federico Blee
Coincidentally the name of the white, pink-haired CEO of The Beyond Corporation, which is not involved in making new Batman Beyond cartoons. Drat the luck.
This isn't really a Spider-Man book. It's a Daughters of the Dragon book, which isn't a bad thing if you like the Daughters of the Dragon. I happen to love Misty Knight and Colleen Wing. So, good on me.
If you're buying the book out of your loyalty for Spider-Man, you're out of luck. Because it doesn't even feature the Spider-Man you're looking for.
That's a lot of information.
Let me break it down for newcomers. Misty Knight and Colleen Wing--The Daughters of the Dragon--debuted as Iron Fist cast members in Marvel Premiere back in the seventies.
Misty and Colleen also received their own feature in the contemporary magazine Deadly Hands of Kung-Fu. Years later they would again take the spotlight when Marvel restarted their magazine endeavor.
Colleen and Misty are private investigators who run Knightwing Restorations. I don't know why the Powers That Be referred to them as Daughters of the Dragon. My guess is that it's just ballyhoo to better connect them with the Martial Arts scene happening back then. No matter. They are casually groundbreaking.
With the exception of Nancy Drew and her cohorts Bess and George, and maybe the 1970s iteration of Rose and Thorn, Misty Knight and Colleen Wing are the first female detective partners in fiction. Certainly the first professionals. They beat Cagney and Lacey by about ten years.
Colleen Wing is a supreme swords woman who also knows all the moves and semi-mystical secrets of seventies Iron Fist due to a controversial Mind-Meld with Danny Rand.
Misty Knight is an ex-cop who lost her arm to a terrorist bomb. Hence her turn to the private sector. Because this is Marvel Comics, Tony Stark gifted her with a bionic arm.
Ben Reilly, our Spider-Man d'jour, is the first clone of Peter Parker that made it out alive. Reilly is from the original clone story from the seventies. He also previously adopted the Spider-Man guise when--oh, let's call it food poisoning--waylaid Peter out of the webs.
Yeah. Apparently Ben lost his memories. No idea how. Beyond Corporation hired Colleen and Misty to train Ben Reilly. They're his sponsor for reasons I cannot fathom. So Colleen conceives the ultimate fighting arena.
Avengers Murder Mansion. Like the Danger Room only with Avengers.
That's as far as the Spider-Man related material goes. Beyond's leader Max has other plans for Colleen and Misty in the issue.
Welcome to Jed MacKay's forte. Conceiving enjoyable adventures and antics featuring kind-of or low-powered superheroes.
The monster hunt leads to all sorts of entertaining mayhem as well as a justifiably staccato styled narrative where Max Debriefs Misty and Colleen in between the flashback battle sequences against the monster.
The battle grows more complex. The monster reveals some unusual powers that drop Colleen and Misty into the Avengers Murder Mansion. Trouble is. If they die in here, they die for real.
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The Daughters of the Dragon don't die. They return in Amazing Spider-Man 91.Bey to battle Beyond Corporation's basement of Misfit Toy Creatures. On the bright side, for Spidey fans, this book features the Spider-Man you're looking for.
Sara Pichelli, Fran Galan, Brian Reber
Thrill to Daughters of the Dragon fighting alongside the true Spider-Man, now better. And his also-ran.
Misty and Colleen haven't teamed up with the real Spidey for years. In fact, one of Iron Fist's major stories concludes in Chris Claremont's and John Byrne's Marvel-Team Up.
Now, at this point you may be wondering how I managed to miss 79.Bey to 88.Bey. I have no idea. I have no idea how this numbering system works. I have no clue as to what titles it spans, and I paid attention. You see my problem with subscribing to the Spider-Man titles?
91.Bey doesn't immediately continue into 92.Bey. You have to stop by plain old Amazing Spider-Man 92 to get the rest of the story. Except this plain old Spider-Man is decked out as something else.
Now, honestly does that make any sense to you? You may think that okay, they just stopped with the .Bey business, but no. 92 follows into Amazing Spider-Man 92.Bey. WTF.
Anywho, behind door number two, or Z as they refer to it, the Lizard. He's on the cover. It's hardly a spoiler.
The Lizard is one of the classic Spider-Man menaces that go all the way back to the creators Stan Lee and Steve Ditko.
He's actually Dr. Curt Conners, a well meaning biologist trying to use the regenerative powers of lizards to grow a new arm. Alas, things go awry.
Depending on the Spider-Man era you drop in on, Curt Conners' can be perfectly sane, teaching at college. He may be a semi-intelligent Lizard primed to protect his son from the evil Stegron. He may also be utterly mindless and bent on pure destruction.
with Ze Carlos
Now the chap whose DNA got spliced into the Lizard should be no surprise given his unanticipated movie career. This is a spoiler I guess. Go to the next cover graphic if you don't wish to know....
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...Beyond spliced Michael Morbius' DNA into the Lizard. It's both dumb and brilliant at the same time.
First of all, there's absolutely no need for this to happen. The Lizard without Conners' conscience is more than enough of a threat. Second, Michael Morbius isn't really a vampire of the undead variety. He's a scientific vampire created inadvertently in attempt to cure a blood disease. So, yeah, he would have viable living DNA.
The metamorphosis into Morbius the Living Vampire also turned Michael quite insane. Spider-Man's radioactive blood charged with lightning cured Morbius for a helluva long time, but eventually, he reverted back to bloodsucker. The difference is that this time around, he kept his marbles and has been on an even keel for most of his modern existence.
Third, Thompson raises some interesting parallels between Morbius and the Lizard. Things I never really considered before. Both scientists. Both looking for a cure. Both caught in an experiment gone skewed. Both vacillating between bouts of insanity and long periods of sanity. Both turned into monsters. Fourth, I don't actually know if including Morbius in this hootenanny was Thompson's idea or not, but she does something with the inclusion. It doesn't just lie there. And the dialogue scripted by Jed MacKay brings everything home.
I hesitate to call Amazing Spider-Man 92.Bey a Spider-Man book. MacKay concludes the Daughters of the Dragon contract and the problems of the Lizard and Moribus in the first section then reintroduces the lady in the Spider-Spotlight. For the record, Ben Reilly appears on one page. Just one. Peter Parker? Sorry. Nowhere to be found.
Artist Unknown. There's a whole bunch to choose from this issue.
It's real surprising to see Captain Marvel's history presented in a whole different light. Changes in Avengers writers were the real life reasons for Captain Marvel's downfall. While one writer raised Captain Marvel to Avengers leader, another knocked her off the team. Still, more over the years felt warmth for Monica than the low-rent mystic Dr. Druid, who I believe is absolutely nowhere in comics at this moment and sonuvagun not part of the Marvel cinematic universe. That's right. I'm dissing Dr. Druid. Wanna make something of that? Of course not. Ben Reilly has more fans. So does the Menudo version of Vibe.
Captain Marvel teams up with another hero of her acquaintance languishing for care. Together they take down Beyond's current operations. Hamstringing them at best, but it's a good hit and gives the letterer something to do as well. A callback to another time and another place.
I suppose the most remarkable thing about this group of Spider-Man books is how little Spider-Man involves himself. I would be interested in how this story went over amongst the rabid Spidey fans. In any case, I found the group helluva entertaining.
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